What really drives OCD?

As an individual with OCD there are many areas of my attempts at Gospel living that can become confused. Let me be clear that the Gospel is real. It is true. God lives and He knows and loves us. As I lock in hard to my OCD version of Gospel living, problems can and do occur. I once was walking down the street outside a gas station and saw a razor blade on the street. What should I do? I picked it up and put in the trash, only after some deliberation. If I leave it, i thought, someone might get hurt and that would be my fault. After throwing it in the garbage can, I worried about the garbage person. They might get cut when they pull the bag from the can, which again would be my fault. Either way trying to do the "right thing" had caused me serious issues. I decided to tell the attendant about it. He listened, probably felt sorry for me and I felt better. As a home teacher it pained me to miss an appointment as this would be less than perfect service and I would feel guilty. I did not always have the needs of the saints in mind when i would leave to home teach, just the desire to not offend God and feel bad. These are examples of how I have been affected, but, all in all, as time passes I learn a little here and there that helps me. f you suffer from OCD type issues, have you ever considered what it is that drives your fear? When i need to go back to the office to check the PC is switched off and the staff kettle is turned off, what is that all about? I think it really relates to fear of getting into trouble. If, as my mind races through all the consequences, I really break it down it usually corresponds to fear of man. If I don't check and there is a fire, I will be responsible and in deep trouble along the way. Having made such a discovery, does it change my behaviour? Nope! It does help me know where I may need to change in time. I am on a healing journey. I will not lie down to feelings of despair and fear (I hope and pray that I won't at least). I hope my blog can help you know that healing is out there and that there are others who suffer too. Thanks for reading. Until next time..............